My last chocolate binge...

I've set myself a challenge - no solid chocolate for the whole of June. That's a whole month without my daily fix Cadbury Freddo bars; a whole month with no goodies from Hotel Chocolat. How will I survive!

Of course, in best caveman tradition I have stocked up on chocolate as much as I could these last two days ensuring my chocolate stash was safe and well-protected by keeping it...in my stomach! I doubt whether I could eat any more. I'll still have hot chocolate to drink and nutella on my ryvita, but I don't binge on either of those - it's the solid stuff I have difficulty with.

So solid chocolate in any disguise is out - no to chocolate digestives, no to chocolate chip cookies. Jaffa cakes - no more. If I'm successful I won't be the only one losing pounds (lbs), my local shops will be losing pounds (£) from my lost custom...

Still eating chocolate - and lost 1 lb!

I've lost 1 lb - yippee!

Why am I so happy? Because I'm still eating chocolate! I've always been known to do things slightly differently, but losing weight while eating chocolate is not how I expect to lose weight but I can't quite get my focus back after my holiday bingeing. And what I haven't mentioned is that I have modified some of my other eating - less cakes and biscuits - and increased my walking, although not by much.

But 1 lb is still 1 lb. And as June starts next week I have been thinking about addressing my addiction to chocolate - for the umpteenth time! Actually I once gave it up for a grand total of 21 months; when I started I couldn't even mention the word chocolate and just told people that I didn't eat 'the brown stuff' anymore...how daft is that! Should I give it up? Should I keep eating it? Um...it's a difficult question. Am I up to the challenge?

As June is still a few days away I think I'll just have some chocolate hazelnut spread on a ryvita and think it over...

Why I Need A Makeover...

Some time ago I lost a lot of weight on a very low calorie diet (surviving on shakes, soups and bars) and a lot of walking. I lost 42 lbs in 100 days! It was great. I was lighter, didn't get puffed out so much and clothes shopping was a breeze.

Now, almost 5 years later and I look like my 'before' photo...and that's not a pretty sight!

I did lose a bit of weight for my holiday by eating shakes for breakfast, real food for lunch, pasta mealpacks for tea and protein bars for an evening snack. Result? I'd stopped obsessing about food, my breath was bad, my cellulite increased - but I was looking better. The holiday came - and I fell off the wagon. And once I'd got a taste for those wonderfully dangerous carbs - otherwise known as cakes, biscuits and pic'n'mix sweets - there was no stopping me. If it wasn't nailed down I ate it, sometimes bingeing until I felt ill.

So the holiday clothes have been relegated to the 'can't get into it' wardrobe while the regained weight has plumped up my cellulite so that it doesn't look so bad (how can that be fair!) And this pre-holiday weight loss and post-holiday bingeing has all taken place within the last 4 weeks.

Call it a midlife crisis or complete exasperation but I just can't go on like this!

I want to be able to go shopping without leaving the changing room in despair. I want to have clear skin on my face and no orange peel skin on my bum and thighs. I want my hair to look good without it costing the earth and a smile even a dentist would be proud of...and that's just for starters...

I just want to look good again, or at least, look better. I know it might be hard - I'm not known for my stamina when it comes to diet and exercise - and I know I could put my energy to someting more useful, but this is my challenge...and I'm going for it!